Hi, we are Damon and Jill. Thank you for taking the time to learn more about and possibly consider us as prospective parents.
We met in 2010 through a non-profit organization active in South Africa. As our lives took us to various states and countries, we kept in touch but didn’t start dating until four years later. We dated for two years, getting to know each other, our families, and our friends. We spent lots of time talking – while walking, riding bikes, eating meals, watching basketball, and hanging out on the couch.
In February 2016, we were married, and seven years later, we genuinely enjoy spending time together. While we aren’t especially funny people, we laugh a lot when we’re together. What’s the new eHarmony tagline – “get who gets you”? Increasingly over time, we get each other.
When we married, we knew we wanted to grow our family through adoption. Adoption has shaped both our families – one of our parents is adopted, and two are birth parents. It was important to us that we had a strong foundation in our marriage before becoming parents. Communication and learning to navigate life as an interracial couple have been areas of focus for us. Now, we feel as ready as we can be and look forward to being parents.
Growing up, I had two things I loved to do: play basketball and video games. As a kid, I dreamed of playing in the NBA. Unfortunately, I never had the talent or the skill (or the height, if I’m honest) to make that a reality.
Since the NBA wasn’t working out, I focused on my love for playing video games which led to an interest in technology, sparking my curiosity about how things work. In high school, my parents made me attend a summer program that had a computer programming class. I knew during this program that I wanted to do something with computers. I chose to pursue a degree in Computer Engineering, and I am so glad to have made that decision because it led to working in a field where I am continuously learning and solving problems.
Outside of work, I find it relaxing and energizing to work on projects and build things. An ongoing project is my saltwater fish and coral tank. I built the plumbing, electrical, and water filtration system for it. There are eleven fish and numerous colorful corals. Last winter, I had a huge algae breakout, and I couldn’t figure out how to get rid of it. I even thought about shutting down the tank, but I stuck with it, and now it’s peaceful again and beautiful to watch.
I am excited to create amazing projects to help spark a child’s curiosity and make learning about the world – hopefully including engineering and science – fun.
I love to cultivate growth and support the success of others.
For the past 18 years, I have been an educator in various capacities. I keep in touch with students I taught as a high school teacher. Currently, I teach and coach reading teachers. I feel most successful in my work when the teachers I coach and their students grow in confidence and success.
I have also mentored young women for the past decade. Recently on a morning walk with one of my “girls,” I marveled at how much growth and maturity I have gotten to watch over the eleven years we’ve been walking together relationally.
Within our church community, I teach adult classes. I’m always looking for ways that God’s love connects with our daily lives so that our learning can be relevant and meaningful. Damon and I are also members of a board that supports pastors and church planters of color who are women. We are among the founding members of this board because we prioritize supporting spiritual leaders who reflect our family and are too often unsupported.
Our home is filled with plants – lush, green, and live-giving – both inside and out. It makes me smile to see a new leaf or flower thriving. I am frequently delighted by how patient, diligent care cultivates so much beauty.
After years of investing in the growth and joy of others, I’m excited to cultivate and support growth in a child as a mom.
We were intentional about living in a racially diverse neighborhood that reflected our identities. Finding our home took a while, but it was worth the wait. We love our community, and it is perfect for raising children. Our neighbors on either side of us bought their homes the same year we did, so we have enjoyed settling into the neighborhood together. All around us, neighbors are friendly and warm. Our homeowner’s association (where Jill is the board secretary) hosts several community events throughout the year that are well-attended by families and individuals of diverse ages, races, religions, and employment.
Our home is comfortable and inviting and functions well for us since we had extensive renovations completed when we bought it. It includes open spaces for family holidays and gatherings with friends and has extra bedrooms for the out-of-state family to stay with us when they’re in town. We look forward to hosting children’s birthday parties and other fun kid events in our home.
One of our favorite parts of our home is the back patio, where we spend a lot of time year-round. It’s quiet and peaceful with open space, even though we’re in a subdivision. Many evenings the two of us sit back there with a bonfire and conversation, and sometimes family, friends, and neighbors join us in this evening escape and maybe a shared dinner.
The only problem with the back patio is that Jill hasn’t figured out how to keep the neighborhood deer and bunnies from eating the landscape and flowers. Damon “helpfully” teases that she could just not plant things, but that’s never going to happen!
Our families have been important anchors who have shaped us throughout our lives. As adults, we’ve prioritized building strong, healthy relationships with our parents and siblings. None of us are perfect, but we’re committed to being there for each other in moments, little and big. Except for one of Jill’s sisters and her family, all of our family members live nearby – within a few miles or a few hours.
We own a lake house up north with Jill’s siblings. Jill’s dad and stepmom live next door to this house, and her grandma used to live across the lake. She’s been going to this lake her whole life to spend summers with dozens of cousins, aunts, and uncles. Last year, Damon suggested we buy our lake house to make memories with our family. We enjoy different things about the lake – Damon loves fishing and relaxing in nature, while Jill loves water skiing, swimming, and having raft “fights” with her nieces and nephew. Being together with family and friends is what we love most about the lake.
We also have close friends who have been like family for decades. Though our paths through life have changed over the years, we’ve found ways to stay connected and involved in each other’s lives. Our friendships have grown and deepened, from sharing opinions on kitchen renovation decisions (only when asked!) to cooking meals together to supporting kids in various activities.
Our family and friends are really excited for us to be parents and to support us in the journey!
Hobbies & Interests
Together, we love riding bikes and being active, especially when the weather is nice. There’s a 25-mile community bike ride that we participate in every September. We’ve also ridden around in Europe and various cities on vacation.
Jill enjoys weight training/Olympic lifting, and yoga. Growing up, she and her sisters all played soccer. Sometimes spontaneous family soccer games – or silly string fights – break out when we’re together. Jill is equally happy reading a book or journaling at the kitchen island.
A few years ago, Damon got a basketball rim for his birthday, and he enjoys playing pickup basketball with his cousins and friends. Sometimes Jill shoots around with him in the driveway, but more often, it’s the neighbors who join him when they hear the ball bouncing. He also works on his websites “for fun.”
Traditions
Most days, we eat dinner together, making time daily to connect, talk about our day, share things we’ve read or heard on podcasts, make plans, and take care of family business – generally prioritizing time together.
For Christmas, we celebrate with both of our families; however, our Christmas Day tradition is to be home together, exchange gifts, make a special breakfast, and settle in for NBA basketball by the fire.
We have special friends with whom we’ve celebrated Juneteenth for years before it was a national holiday.
Birthdays are Jill’s favorite “holidays” (even though Damon jokes they’re not holidays). They usually include doing something the birthday person chooses, like going to the zoo or taking a day trip, and dinner wherever they want. Gifts are involved, but the memories made together are equally important gifts.
Thank you for taking the time to look at our book. We hope it has added something useful to your decision-making process. We support and respect the decisions you make for yourself and your baby.
Honestly, we can only guess what is involved in being parents, but we can offer a child love, encouragement, enthusiasm, open hearts, and a willingness to learn and grow. If we are chosen as adoptive parents, we are ready and excited for a little one to expand our family. We know they will bring their own personality and flair, so we intend to be receptive and responsive to the unique, wonderful ways they impact us.
We are flexible to whatever degree of openness you choose. With our parent who is adopted and our parents who are birth parents, we have seen up-close how parents and children leave life-long impressions upon each other’s hearts. We want to honor that by sharing with the child the loving choice their mother made for them. She will always be in our conversations, thoughts, and prayers. We hope that someday we will be able to meet and stay connected throughout the child’s life.
We trust that we will be parents to the right child at the right time. Even so, we hope that time is sooner than later! We send you love and prayers as you make important decisions for yourself and your baby, knowing that only you can choose what’s best for you both.
Thank you,
Damon & Jill
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